For the beauty

I have had an extremely fussy and feverish baby attached to my hip for the past 48 hours due to a nasty ear infection. This is the first one I have experienced with either of my children, as Reagan has never had one. They are awful. I now feel as though my parenting initiation is complete. Initially, I was more than a little disappointed in my Thanksgiving experience this year. Repugnant looks shot like daggers in my direction most of Thanksgiving morning, due to my overly-excited and slightly louder than normal 2 year old (who insisted on being dressed as Super Girl for the festivities, mind you.) She rarely gets too rambunctious, so I thought 'no harm, no foul.' I was wrong.
I picked at my food periodically, but didn't feel like I got to really enjoy it, due to previously mentioned attached crying baby.
I felt alone. My husband and family were too busy serving others Thanksgiving dinner at my uncle's restaurant to help me. How dare they, really?! Don't worry. I repented of that as soon as I realized how selfish I was being. Yikes.
Later, we all got together to play games, enjoy leftovers, and eat dessert. I was stuck listening to the festivities and laughter in the next room, in the dark, trying to soothe, again, my attached crying baby. Needless to say, we went home early.
It's fair to say that this Thanksgiving didn't go as perfectly as I had planned for it to in my head. Tonight, I have had a bit of time to think and reflect. Reagan is having a slumber-party at her Nana and Bumpa's house, and my feverish baby is finally sleeping, hopefully peacefully, in her bed. My husband is at work. Strangely enough, I do not feel lonely. I put on my latest favorite album to listen to as I did the dishes. (The Lower Lights Hymn Revival. Buy it. Extremely worth it.) This song came on.

For the beauty of the Earth,
For the glory of the skies;
For the love which from our birth,
Over and around us lies;
Lord of all, to Thee we raise
This, our joyful hymn of praise.

For the beauty of each hour,
Of the day and of the night;
Hill and vale and tree and flow'r,
Sun and moon and stars of light;
Lord of all, to Thee we raise,
This, our joyful hymn of praise.

For the joy of human love,
Brother, sister, parent, child;
Friends on Earth and friends above,
For all gentle thoughts and mild;
Lord of all, to Thee we raise,
This, our joyful hymn of praise.

For each perfect gift of Thine,
To our race so freely given,
Graces human and divine,
Flowers on earth and buds in heaven,
Lord of all, to Thee we raise,
This, our joyful hymn of praise.

This song has been my favorite choice of lullaby to sing to the girls before they go to sleep as of late. Tonight, as I slowly and methodically scrubbed the dishes, these words sunk into my heart. They are so beautiful. The phrases ring so true to me. 'For the love which from our birth, over and around us lies.' 'For the beauty of each hour.' 'For the joy of human love.' It's like these words were written just for me, at that very moment, to listen to as my hands warmed in the soapy water. I can think of nothing more poignant to even begin to describe how incredibly grateful I am for everything that I have been given. It is rare that I make it through this hymn without getting misty-eyed. It is beautiful, because it is true.

So, my Thanksgiving didn't happen flawlessly. I just can't be bitter about it, when most of my days are filled with the laughter of my healthy, beautiful daughters, hugs and kisses abound, my husband reminds me daily that I am loved and appreciated, I am warm and well-fed, I enjoy freedom that so many in this world do not, I know where I came from and where I am going, I know that I am a daughter of God...the list is endless. Thanksgiving this year was a lesson in humility for me. I am so far from perfect, it is almost embarrassing. But, I am also grateful for it. I have a lot to work on, and I have been given this very blessed and privileged life to work on it in. I am so grateful that those that love me are patient with me when I am being a brat. =) Especially my Heavenly Father. The words of that hymn were a good reminder to me tonight, to say the least.